I call you friend regardless of whether or not I know you at this present moment simply because you and I are both on this journey called life. That is a fantastic starting point for any conversation we may have!
Speaking of conversation, I have an important question to ask you. What defines who you are?
We all hold different roles in our lives. Depending on our life stage it may be our position on a job, our career, being home full time raising our children, being a student, or retired from the workforce.
In personal life we hold familial roles such a being a daughter, son, wife, husband, mother, father, and so on. We may have authority over others in some of these roles. We all have some accomplishments, skills, hobbies, connections with other people through a variety of ways. All contribute to giving our life meaning, purpose, and identity. Key word is “contribute.”
That said, I have another important question for you. What would happen to you, and in you, if you lost any of these things, or if any were taken from you?
I used to define myself and my existence, my life, my purpose, by the roles I had, my job, my abilities. However, in doing that, there was a part of me that felt purposeless and drifting even while firmly and actively engaged in the roles I held as a daughter, student, friend, employee, wife, mom. I was defined by what I did, and how well I did it. My life from young on was a relentless cycle of trying to live up to expectations (whether others or my own; whether real or imagined), perfectionism, and the crushing agony of never being “enough”, whatever “enough” was.
We can certainly enjoy life, be successful, be looked up to by others, be moral and honest, be kind and loving and generous to others, or even be outwardly religious and yet, be missing an absolutely critical component to life, our identity, and our future.
For a very long time (37 years of my current 53 years of life) I definitely was missing that critical piece. However, I just as definitely did not recognize that I was missing anything, nor would I have recognized it had someone clearly pointed it out to me. I simply did not see it, yet.
And then, something changed. March 2004, 37 years 4 months old. It was the beginning of the end. The end of myself. Radical, life-giving, eternally impacting change. I saw what that missing critical component was. It changed everything. Forever. The enormity and beauty of this is larger than anything one can even imagine. This blog/website exists to help explain it.
Let us start in the most logical place, at the beginning. You have an open door. All are welcome. Please, come on in!